Sometimes a little lie is easier than telling the truth.
Before I share my fibs, I need you to know that I don’t lie about the big stuff. When my kids asked about Santa, sex, body parts/functions, and childbirth, I was ready with informative, truthful, and anatomically correct answers! But I’ve been known to tell fibs in regards to the little, everyday things. Here are a few of my little white lies I’ve told my kids.
- The tooth fairy must have been busy last night! I can’t imagine she would forget to come…let’s call her!
- School artwork, two versions:
- I’m not sure where your artwork is right now! (Which technically isn’t a lie because I’m not sure where the trash man took it.)
- No, I didn’t throw away your artwork, I put it in the special keepsake box I keep high in the closet!
- Chick-Fil-A is closed today! I know, I’m disappointed that they are closed on Sundays and Wednesdays, too! (Sometimes they are also closed on a random Tuesday.)
- Ants got into your Halloween candy and I had to throw it away. (I really ate it…)
- Ants got into the freezer and ate your leftover Sonic Blast! (Me again!)
- Yes, I saw every lap at swim practice! Yes, all 400!
- Yes, I’m listening! Star Wars? B0ba Fett? At-Ats are my favorite, too. (This has an 80% success rate.)
- No, we don’t have dessert tonight! I’m disappointed, too! (No way are they getting the last cookie! My husband and I usually split that once the kids are in bed.)
- I’m not sure what your friends are talking about when they say they go to bed when it’s dark outside. What is this “dark?” (My kids go to bed early. Before my oldest went to Kindergarten, she was in bed and asleep by 5:30pm. I’ll never forget when we stayed up late on Halloween and she was amazed at how dark it was outside!)
- The Xbox is broken! Sorry, we can’t watch movies. (Really it was unplugged. It was easier for me to unplug it than constantly tell my kids that they were out of TV time.)
- Will you run upstairs and grab your clothes from the bed? I’ll time you! Go! 1… 2…. 3…. (out of sight) 23…. 24… 25… 25 seconds! Wow, that is a new record!
- If you don’t brush your teeth, they will fall out! (Which is true—dental hygiene is important. But when a little girl in preschool lost her tooth and my kid scolded her for not taking good care of her teeth, I then how to explain baby teeth vs. adult teeth.)
- No, I’m serious! Star Wars is my favorite! (Lie. Lie. LIE.)
- Yes, there is a monster under your bed and if you get out of bed HE IS GOING TO GET YOU! (I’m not proud of this parenting moment but I was tired and I put her to bed five times already that night and it just came out…But she didn’t get out of bed again.)
- You can’t play in the indoor play place because that is where the flu lives. (Which is actually a true statement.)