When Expectations Go Unmet: Mom Guilt

Being a mom is a sweet, sweet feeling. I am my son’s nourisher, caretaker, nurturer, entertainer, teacher and the list goes on. My heart swells knowing that as my little boy grows up, I am his mama, and no one can take that away.

momguiltccmbIf I’m being honest with myself though, I don’t have that sweet feeling in my heart during late night feedings. I don’t have it when he spits up on my clean shirt for the fourth time, or when he’s screaming and I can’t seem to soothe him. There are moments when I begin to wonder if I am cut out for this.

Can I really function on such little sleep for months on end? Can I truly be the supermom I’ve always dreamt of being?

Motherhood has only just begun for me and I am already realizing I can never live up to the picture in my mind. I won’t always be patient, I won’t always be thrilled about the late nights and early mornings. I won’t always keep my composure when my child pushes my buttons. I will have tired eyes and messy hair. I will struggle to get it all done. There will be days that the laundry will still be in the hamper, the dishes will still be dirty and we’ll resort to leftovers because my afternoon was consumed. I don’t live up to the expectations I have for myself. And I feel guilty about that. I feel that all too common, “Mom Guilt” because I can’t do it all and do it perfectly.

The joy that I have because I am my son’s mama is an irreplaceable feeling. With all that is going on outside of me, the guilt and stress of life, my heart is forever connected to his. It’s an unexplained connection, that I couldn’t have predicted before becoming a mother. We can’t do it all, but we are mamas to our babies. We love them with all we have and that’s what truly matters.

Our kids won’t remember if we always had it all together, they’ll remember that we spent time with them and loved them well. From what I hear, the days can drag on but the years will pass by quickly!

Don’t allow yourself to get caught up in the guilt.

Be the best mama you can be to your child and cherish each moment you have with them.

Meredith is wife to Ryan and mama to Titus (born June 2016) truly living her dream as a stay-at-home mom. She was born and raised in Collin County, left for a season to become a Texas Tech graduate and has recently returned to her hometown of McKinney! She is a Type A, lover of writing, baking, making lists and all things Fall. With her husband, she enjoys spending time at home with her sweet son and exploring all the fun that is the DFW area! You can find her on her personal blog, Hello Sweet Cheer, or on Instagram @meredithholguin!


  1. Honest, yet sweet words. Realizing your place in his life despite your occasional doubts is more than half the battle. These small frustrations you are experiencing now will be mere vapors in the totality of his life. As you said, being there through everything is what will make the most impact on his life. Hang in there, you are doing great!

  2. Very well said! This is true when your kids are 2 or when they’re 22!! And they will always be your babies!!

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