CCM’s Consciously Coupled Relationship Series :: Finding Alone Time Away from Kids

*Consciously Coupled* explores everything relationships from local moms AND a licensed couples counselor. We’re discussing couples therapy, the pros and cons of relationship books, tips on navigating cross-cultural relationships, how to find time alone as a couple, and MUCH MORE! See the entire series here.

When my husband and I first had our son in 2016, our closest family lived about 1,000 miles away. So, finding the time to get away was very few and far between. We had to get creative in finding alone time away from kids. Now that our son is almost five, it’s a tad easier to figure things out since there’s not a specific feeding schedule or the need for diapers.

Stay at Home

No babysitter; no problem! Here’s a few ideas in finding alone time with kids at home:

Fancy Dinner

My husband and I love trying local steakhouses. Our two favorites are Bob’s and Flemings. But, if you want to have the entire experience with appetizers, drinks, dinner, and dessert, you have to be prepared to drop a few hundred dollars. I am blessed in that my husband loves to cook. He watches YouTube videos all the time that help him out. Instead of dropping a ton of money at a steakhouse, go to your local meat market—we like Hirsch’s and Local Yocal —and buy a couple of steaks for a mere fraction of the cost. Our second (and new) favorite meal to make at home is crab legs! It’s fairly easy, and oh-so-delicious! For our seven-year anniversary, my husband made this for us and it was so delicious!

Dessert Night

If you are not a baker, find a few local bakeries. Grab a few of your favorites, and enjoy the night rating your favorite desserts! Here’s an oldie but goodie CCM article on the best desserts around Collin County!

Movie Night

One of my husband’s and my favorite things to do is to take turns picking movies. Pre-streaming services, we had over 200 DVDs at one point. They are now scattered at various Movie Trading Companies and Half Price Books where we re-sold them. With so many streaming services at your fingertips, this is what I recommend based off what we do. If it’s your turn to pick the movie, come up with four or five movies. If you or your spouse hasn’t seen them, pull up the trailer. Get your stack together. We would put two movies head-to-head and flip a coin. If tails win, you discard the movie you assigned to heads. Makes it a little more interesting.

Plan Your Future

After 12 years of being together (seven married), my husband is fully aware that I love all things planning. About twice a year we will do a little executive retreat where we review the past six to 12 months, and plan the future. It’s a great time for us to talk about our personal goals, couple goals, our son, financial, one, five, and 10 years down the road. It’s nice for us to talk about our hopes and dreams and come up with a game plan on how to make them a reality!

Other At-Home Date Ideas

Take Your Kid/s with You (Hear Me Out!)

Finding alone time away from kids doesn’t just have to mean staying at home! Here’s a few ways where we take our son with us, but still enjoy time “alone” together.

Indoor Play Place

Find an indoor play place where your kid/s can run wild, and you can spend time with your spouse. My husband and I personally love taking our son to Kid Mania. We bought the three-month pass for $50 for him, which is a steal considering a one-time visit is $9. Also, we bring cards so we can play uno or gin rummy. That way we can stay there for an hour or two, and are only occasionally interrupted by a panting child wanting some water before he goes back in.

Kid-Friendly Restaurants

Find a restaurant like Hat Creek Burger, where you can enjoy a dinner and your kid can play outside or at whatever play area they have available.

Gym with Childcare

We personally have a membership to the McKinney Apex Centre and love it! There are designated playroom hours Monday through Friday, shorter hours Saturday, and no playroom on Sunday. This allows my husband and me to get a gym session in while our son is at the playroom.

Various Childcare Resources

Friend/Family Babysitter

This is our go to. Not just because we trust family way more than anyone else with our son, but also because every time we find a babysitter, something comes up with the babysitter. Our last one moved to Austin.

Double-Date and Share a Sitter

This way saves money but also allows you time with your spouse and your friends!

School Day Dates

This has always been a favorite of ours. We will plan a vacation day while our son is in school. It always feels like a “skip” day from when we were in high school, but it’s not!

Babysitting Swap

Once a month you babysit someone else’s kid/s, and they go on a date, then the next time they babysit for you!


Last week my hairdresser asked me if I loved my son more than my husband (it fit the context of our conversation) and I quickly said no. She was taken aback by that response, but it’s how I feel. My son will leave me at some point. He will go off into the world and build his own family, leaving my husband and I together. It has and always will be important for us to find alone time away from kids. Some times we just have to work harder to get that alone time than others.

How do you find alone time away from kids?

 

Kara was born in Florida, lived in Washington State and California as a Navy brat, and then settled in Jacksonville, Florida. That was until work moved her to Texas. Her (then) boyfriend followed her out, and there they got engaged, married, and welcomed their son, Mark, in 2016. Then Kara was a surrogate and welcomed her surro-baby in September 2019. Her favorite hobbies including finding adventures (aka free things to do) on weekends with her family around town, spending time at her parents in Oklahoma, fitness and working towards paying off their debt. You can read more about her family, fitness and financial freedom journey on her website - Taking KARA Myself.

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